Cuddle-Bug

generally, you would never hear me say "my baby girls is such a cuddler!" but this past week or so, it's actually been true. aria is finally learning to snuggle.

now, i'm not really sure how much of this has to do with teething and the fact we were sick last week, but it's been nice to have her snuggle up to me and just lay there...without using me as a jungle gym, pulling off my glasses (and sometimes hair) and jumping out of my arms to chew on the remote control. i'm hoping this all has more to do with her learning attachment than her being sick; she's always been very attached to her father and whenever he's around she's rarely content to be held/played with by anyone else...until recently. it appears my child might actually like me. she smiled at me the other day when i picked her up from the babysitters and when i got her out of bed yesterday morning, she hugged me rather than trying to climb out of my arms into her play saucer! it was a big moment.

but last night was the biggest thrill moment for me in a while...she fell asleep while i was holding her. now, to some most of you, that does seem to be a big deal. but if you know aria, you realize how big of a deal it actually is. besides being the most energetic child you've ever met, she's also slightly ....er... distracted. by everything. but last night she relaxed, got cozy in my arms and fell right asleep. it's like she's finally figuring out that she's safe. and there's no greater feeling than your content sleeping baby in your arms.

Mirror, Mirror

one of aria's favorite things to do is let me carry her into the bathroom and stare at the mirror...watching her and i make faces and letting her touch her reflection in the mirror - she couldn't be happier. she loves seeing herself in the mirror sometimes still gets confused as to whether i'm in front of her or holding her. these activities will go on as long as i let them...she's never bored with that mirror.

i look in the mirror at her and wonder...how will this reaction of hers change over the years? will she always look in the mirror and smile? or will she look in the mirror and wish someone...something else was greeting her? i personally think she's the most beautiful person God ever created, but will she always see her beauty, her inner beauty?

when she smiles, my life gets better - my whole world lights up when she laughs. i can only hope that her smile stays this real and genuine as she grows up. she expresses joy ever every little new discovery. the whole world is her playground, even if all she knows of that world is our living room, her bedroom and her stroller lol. she can be fascinated with the corner of a pillow for 15 minutes, never mind the incredulity she has when we show her a toy that plays music and lights up. so many wonderful things in her little world...will she always have a love for discovery?

when i pick her up in the morning after she wakes up, she holds on to me for dear life. when she's sick, she just wants to be held, which is relatively unusual for her, actually. when she's tired, she doesn't want to be alone, esp if her daddy is home. she loves hearing josh's and my voices and if she can see our faces and hear us at the same time - all the better. she needs us, and it's a wonderfully scary feeling. i want to be everything i can be for this little person who needs me. will i always be there? give her the best advice? and the biggest question, will i ever disappoint her because i don't meet her needs?

so many questions that run through my head just from a simple, daily trip to the bathroom mirror. i want to be the best mommy i can be, for her. but right now, she just needs a diaper change, so we'll start with that.

6 happy months :)

Yesterday was aria's 6 month birthday and we celebrated by lots of play time and a couple long naps :) just had me reflecting on the past 6 months that aria's been in our life and how our lives had changed....rather...if there were ways it hadn't changed lol.

aria arrived july 26th of this past year and right away, josh and i experienced a whole new kind of love - i mean, you love that baby to death before they're born, for sure, but when you get to look into their little , unfocused eyes and hold that tiny little bundle of not-too-happy-it's-so-cold-out-here, it's a whole other world. i found myself laughing and crying at the same time; it's really just indescribable.

and then we got home...and i became the mos paranoid person i know. seriously, i was a mess. aria would NOT sleep on her back - if we even so much as lay her down on her back she would scream, which doesn't make for good sleeping habits; thus, with aria sleeping in the not-at-all-recommended belly position, i had to monitor her every time she slept. and by "monitor" i mean, sit next to her cradle and watch her. at all times. i was nuts.

since then, i've relaxed a little on the whole "monitoring" thing lol, but with aria's very active lifestyle, she still requires quite a big of supervision, but not on the "hovering" level. she's managed to find herself in some of the oddest predicaments due to her uncoordinated movements all over the place...she has discovered a love for sticking her head in the corner of her crib and trying to put it through the bars. fortunately, we all know this will never happen, but the fact that she tries is...well, disturbing.

watching aria grow and learn new things and discover new noises coming out of her mouth has been a blast...she is definitely the most entertaining thing that could possibly have happened to our little family and i can't wait to see what the next 6 months will hold. probably a couple new words, teeth and steps :)

Who could say no to that face?

How beautiful is she? And no, I'm not biased.... ;)

First night away

yep... it happened. aria's first night away from home, away from mommy and away from daddy. she went to mimi's. alone. without me. by herself. it was a big step - can you tell?

for those of you who aren't parents you may not understand how big of a step this is - letting your little one stay with their grandparents is normal, everybody does it and it's perfectly acceptable. but the first time? oh, it's a big deal, let me tell you.

and for those of you wondering, yes, i cried. i was a mess - i'm so used to having my baby play with us at night in her saucer and the little "good night ritual" ...and she wasn't there. and it was sad. but it was good for me - i mean, i can't keep her home FOREVER. and it's not like my mom didn't take good care of her! in fact, i'm sure in reality, aria hardly missed us with all the spoiling she got; but still....it was a big deal.

in fact, after she left on thursday night, i wasn't going to see her again until friday night after my Thirty-One party, but friday was so lonely and quiet, i went up early so i could see her that afternoon...

one would think after almost 6 months of constantly being with your little one, you'd be ready for a break, and in a way i was, but they become such an integral part of your life - EVERYTHING you do revolves around them - that when they're not there it's....weird.

but all's well that ends well, and aria was truly happy as a lark to spend some time with mimi and grandpa and it was nice to get a full night's sleep...